With every step I draw a ragged breath

My sunken eyes turn warily behind

I grasp for life but my bones only grip decay

I’m suffocated by strife

Haunted by capricious lovers of my own making

my heart is consumed by a worm of restlessness

An insatiable hunger gnawing at my soul

I scream for air, for something, anything to disturb the dust of my mundane life.

The lusts of this world welcome me with open arms

offering me dreams gilt in gold

I chase after them to soothe the aching and the angst but I shackle myself to death

In my innermost being I know we’re all created for something so much bigger than ourselves

This hunger that should give hope,

The Father of Lights uses to woo me

Relentlessly creating moments to capture my desire

He offers me infinite beauty, but it’s a beauty that wounds,

and all I really want is to be distracted.

Fiercely not content to have my lukewarm affections,

God seeks to destroy the comfort of my disordered loves.

I shy away from the violent pursuit of my heart.

So I take what the world has to offer, thinking it will be my instant joy,

But really all I’ve got are maggots.

Alas, my perfidious heart.